A Parents' Nightmare

It was a horrendous accident over the Thanksgiving weekend -- the car split into pieces, the engine on fire, one teen seriously injured, and two dead on impact. One of them was the younger brother of my daughter's friends -- a boy she had loved like a brother herself for many years.

From the moment we first hold our babies in our arms we know we can lose them. We push that thought to the far recesses of our minds -- otherwise we would be paralyzed with fear. On Friday night, two families were suddenly shattered by the loss of their children, and the rest of us felt a chill -- knowing it can happen to any of us in a heartbeat.

Of course, for me this was a more personal tragedy, even though I didn't know the boy, because I know and love his sisters, and because my own daughter was consumed with grief over his loss. The funeral today was unbearably sad, and I cannot imagine the depth of his family's grief -- and pray that I never will have to bear this unthinkable sorrow myself.

Maybe, because of my own deep emotions , I am over-reacting, but I have been appalled by the insensitivity of some people. They blithely comment that people just don't train their teenagers about safe driving; a newspaper article on the morning of the funeral discussed the driver's negligence in adhering to the restrictions on her junior license. Why, when young people die in a car accident, do we rehash all the issues of teen behavior? When the wounds are so fresh for their families, why do we have to analyze it all and cast blame? In our society, we always seem to need to blame someone. This accomplishes nothing and solves nothing.

Why can't we just let their families bury them in peace?!